Creative Writing Made Easy
Saturday, March 15, 2014
Tuesday, March 4, 2014
FATHER, I WANTED A CAR, NOT A BIBLE
FATHER, I WANTED A CAR, NOT A BIBLE
A young man was getting ready to graduate from college. For many months he had admired a beautiful sports car in a dealers showroom,
and knowing his father could well afford it, he told him that was all he wanted.
As Graduation Day approached, the young man awaited signs that his
father had purchased the car. Finally, on the morning of his
graduation, his father called him into his private study, told him how proud he was to have such a fine son, and how much he loved him. He handed him a beautifully wrapped gift box.
Curious, but somewhat disappointed, the young man opened the box and
found a lovely, leather-bound Bible, with his name embossed
in gold.
Angrily, he raised his voice to his father and said,"With all your money you give me a Bible?" He stormed out of the house, leaving the Bible behind.
Many years passed and the young man was very successful in business. He had a beautiful home and wonderful family, but realized his father was very old. He thought perhaps he should go to him.He had not seen him since that graduation day.
But before he could make arrangements, he received a telegram telling him his father had passed away, and willed all of his possessions to
him. He needed to come home immediately and take care of things.
When he arrived at his father's house, sadness and regret filled his heart. He began to search through his father's important documents
and saw the Bible, new,just as he had left it years ago.
With tears, he opened the Bible and began to turn the pages. His father had
carefully underlined a verse, Matt 7:11,
"And if ye, being evil, know
how to give good gifts to your children, how much more shall your Heavenly Father which is in Heaven, give to those who ask Him?"
As he read those words, a car key dropped from the back of the Bible.It had a tag with the dealers name, the same dealer who had the sports car he had desired.
On the tag was the date of his graduation, and the words...
PAID IN FULL.
A young man was getting ready to graduate from college. For many months he had admired a beautiful sports car in a dealers showroom,
and knowing his father could well afford it, he told him that was all he wanted.
As Graduation Day approached, the young man awaited signs that his
father had purchased the car. Finally, on the morning of his
graduation, his father called him into his private study, told him how proud he was to have such a fine son, and how much he loved him. He handed him a beautifully wrapped gift box.
Curious, but somewhat disappointed, the young man opened the box and
found a lovely, leather-bound Bible, with his name embossed
in gold.
Angrily, he raised his voice to his father and said,"With all your money you give me a Bible?" He stormed out of the house, leaving the Bible behind.
Many years passed and the young man was very successful in business. He had a beautiful home and wonderful family, but realized his father was very old. He thought perhaps he should go to him.He had not seen him since that graduation day.
But before he could make arrangements, he received a telegram telling him his father had passed away, and willed all of his possessions to
him. He needed to come home immediately and take care of things.
When he arrived at his father's house, sadness and regret filled his heart. He began to search through his father's important documents
and saw the Bible, new,just as he had left it years ago.
With tears, he opened the Bible and began to turn the pages. His father had
carefully underlined a verse, Matt 7:11,
"And if ye, being evil, know
how to give good gifts to your children, how much more shall your Heavenly Father which is in Heaven, give to those who ask Him?"
As he read those words, a car key dropped from the back of the Bible.It had a tag with the dealers name, the same dealer who had the sports car he had desired.
On the tag was the date of his graduation, and the words...
PAID IN FULL.
How many times do we miss God's blessings because they are not packaged as we expected?
If this touched your heart, please pass it on!!
Please read b4 u go home or u are at home already,read this to the end. My name is God. You hardly have time for me. I love you and alwys bless u. I am always with you. I need you to spend 30mins of your time with Me today. Don't pray. Just praise.
If this touched your heart, please pass it on!!
Please read b4 u go home or u are at home already,read this to the end. My name is God. You hardly have time for me. I love you and alwys bless u. I am always with you. I need you to spend 30mins of your time with Me today. Don't pray. Just praise.
Thursday, December 26, 2013
Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt.
One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway; it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey.
He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone's amazement he quieted down.
A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. He was astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up.
As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off!
MORAL :
Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a steppingstone. We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up.
Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a steppingstone. We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up.
Remember the five simple rules to be happy:
1. Free your heart from hatred - Forgive.
2. Free your mind from worries - Most never happens.
3. Live simply and appreciate what you have.
4. Give more.
5. Expect less from people but more from yourself.
You have two choices... smile and close this page,
or pass this along to someone else to share the lesson
or pass this along to someone else to share the lesson
is it so wrong to wish a blessed day for those who celebrate it? by Raja Zarith Sofia
Timeline Photos
![]() |
Merry Christmas. An article that has inspired many Malaysians from all walks of life . Written by HRH Raja Zarith Sofiah Sultan Idris Syah, Consort of the Sultan of Johor.
— with Khom Choi, George Jacob, Ashok Kumar andNoorada Morad.If Christmas is the celebration of the birth of Isa (Jesus), a prophet respected and revered in Islam, is it so wrong to wish a blessed day for those who celebrate it? DURING the days before Christmas last year, I wished my friends who were celebrating it "Merry Christmas" in much the same way they would wish me "Selamat Hari Raya" or "Happy Eid". I find it rather sad that such a simple greeting – one which I grew up with and which I have never regarded as something that would compromise or de-value my own faith – is now regarded as something so religiously incorrect for us Malaysian Muslims. When I was at boarding school in England , I had to go to church every Sunday because it was part of the rules. My father advised me to consider it as part of my "education" and he had no doubt that the experience would strengthen rather than weaken my own faith. I was able to see the similarities and differences between Christianity and Islam. I learned more than the average Malaysian Muslim would about Christianity. I learnt that just as we Muslims categorise ourselves according to the four different schools of thoughts of the four Imams (Imam Malik, Imam Al Shafi, Imam Abu Hanifa and Imam Ahmad Abn Hambal) and are either Sunnis or Shias, so Christians too are divided into different sects or churches. Going to church did not make me less of a Muslim when I was a young girl, and neither does saying "Merry Christmas" make me less of a Muslim now. My faith has not been shaken just because I wished some friends a time of joy with their families. Neither will I suddenly suffer from amnesia and forget what my religion is. What I do not wish to forget, however, is that there are good, kind people who are not of the same faith as me. As Harun Yahya, the Turkish writer (he was selected last year as one of the 500 most influential Muslims in the world by the Royal Islamic Strategic Studies Centre of Jordan) noted: "Islam is a religion of peace, love and tolerance". Today, however, some circles have been presenting a false image of Islam, as if there were conflict between Islam and the adherents of the two other monotheistic religions. Yet Islam's view of Jews and Christians, who are named `the People of the Book' in the Quran, is very friendly and tolerant. "This attitude towards the People of the Book developed during the years of the birth of Islam. At that time, Muslims were a minority, struggling to protect their faith and suffering oppression and torture from the pagans of the city of Mecca . Due to this persecution, some Muslims decided to flee Mecca and shelter in a safe country with a just ruler. The Prophet Muhammad told them to take refuge with King Negus, the Christian king of Ethiopia . The Muslims who followed this advice found a very fair administration that embraced them with love and respect when they went to Ethiopia . King Negus refused the demands of the pagan messengers who asked him to surrender the Muslims to them, and announced that Muslims could live freely in his country. "Such attitudes of Christian people that are based on the concepts of compassion, mercy, modesty and justice, constitute a fact that God has pointed out in the Quran." I do not wish to be a self-centred Muslim who expects friends of other faiths to wish me Selamat Hari Raya or, for those who are not Malaysians and therefore do not know about Hari Raya, a Happy Eid and yet do not return their goodwill when it is Christmas, Chinese New Year, Deepavali or Vesak Day. Every year, friends who are Christians, Buddhists, Hindus, Sikhs or those without any faith come to our home to celebrate Hari Raya with us. They do so with sincerity and as a mark of respect for one of the most important days in the Muslim calendar. Why should we not reciprocate their kindness, show them the same mark of respect for their religion and wish them the same joy on their holy days of celebration? An Islamic scholar and lecturer also reminded me that as Muslims we must remember the importance of both the five Pillars of Islam and in the six Pillars of Iman (Faith), which are: Belief in Allah; Belief in the angels; Belief in the revealed Books (which include the Bible, the Torah and the Holy Quran); Belief in the Prophets (May Peace be Upon Them); Belief in the Resurrection and the events of Kiamah, the Day of Judgement; and Belief in the predestination (Qada' and Qadar) by Allah in all things. The prophets include not just Muhammad (May Peace Be Upon Him) as the last prophet and as the Messenger of Islam, but also in the 24 earlier ones who are mentioned in both the Bible and the Quran. Four of them are Ibrahim (Abraham), Musa (Moses), Daud (David), and Isa (Jesus). So, if Christmas is the celebration of the birth of Isa (Jesus), a prophet respected and revered in Islam, is it so wrong to wish a blessed day for those who celebrate it? We are now in the second decade of the 21st century. Surely, we should, now more than ever, be far more enlightened at a time when information of any sort and of all kinds are so readily available to us. What is most important is that we regard one another as fellow citizens and treat each other with respect, regardless of our race or religion. The writer is Royal Fellow, School of Language Studies and Linguistics, Universiti Kebangsaan Malaysia (UKM), and holds a BA (Honours) degree in Chinese Studies, University of Oxford. Mind Matter-by Raja Zarith Kesultanan Kedah |
Tuesday, November 19, 2013
Two Boys Were Playing In Their House When They Made a TERRIFYING Discovery. Seriously, OMG.
Most people believe that they are safe inside their own homes. This story just proves, though, that even that is rarely true. Two boys were playing rough in their parents room when they made a startling discovery. This could chill any homeowner down to their very core.
The house was built in the early 2000s. There was nothing to suggest there was anything weird about it.
Inside, the two boys found the most terrifying thing: evidence that someone was squatting. In their own walls.
Because every stranger living secretly inside of your walls need dolls with soulless eyes.
The police are still looking for the individual that was living in their walls. Since there was little food, it seemed that he came and went as he or she pleased. There was a small pile of clothes around the bedding. The candy seen strewn about the room was actually one of the boy’s, but whoever was living in the wall crept out at night to steal some for himself.
Good luck falling asleep tonight.
Saturday, July 27, 2013
If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem
English Language Coach
If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.
After trying the verses, a Frenchman said he’d prefer six months of hard labour to reading six lines aloud.
Dearest creature in creation,
Study English pronunciation.
I will teach you in my verse
Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse.
I will keep you, Suzy, busy,
Make your head with heat grow dizzy.
Tear in eye, your dress will tear.
So shall I! Oh hear my prayer.
Just compare heart, beard, and heard,
Dies and diet, lord and word,
Sword and sward, retain and Britain.
(Mind the latter, how it’s written.)
Now I surely will not plague you
With such words as plaque and ague.
But be careful how you speak:
Say break and steak, but bleak and streak;
Cloven, oven, how and low,
Script, receipt, show, poem, and toe.
Hear me say, devoid of trickery,
Daughter, laughter, and Terpsichore,
Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles,
Exiles, similes, and reviles;
Scholar, vicar, and cigar,
Solar, mica, war and far;
One, anemone, Balmoral,
Kitchen, lichen, laundry, laurel;
Gertrude, German, wind and mind,
Scene, Melpomene, mankind.
Billet does not rhyme with ballet,
Bouquet, wallet, mallet, chalet.
Blood and flood are not like food,
Nor is mould like should and would.
Viscous, viscount, load and broad,
Toward, to forward, to reward.
And your pronunciation’s OK
When you correctly say croquet,
Rounded, wounded, grieve and sieve,
Friend and fiend, alive and live.
Ivy, privy, famous; clamour
And enamour rhyme with hammer.
River, rival, tomb, bomb, comb,
Doll and roll and some and home.
Stranger does not rhyme with anger,
Neither does devour with clangour.
Souls but foul, haunt but aunt,
Font, front, wont, want, grand, and grant,
Shoes, goes, does. Now first say finger,
And then singer, ginger, linger,
Real, zeal, mauve, gauze, gouge and gauge,
Marriage, foliage, mirage, and age.
Query does not rhyme with very,
Nor does fury sound like bury.
Dost, lost, post and doth, cloth, loth.
Job, nob, bosom, transom, oath.
Though the differences seem little,
We say actual but victual.
Refer does not rhyme with deafer.
Fe0ffer does, and zephyr, heifer.
Mint, pint, senate and sedate;
Dull, bull, and George ate late.
Scenic, Arabic, Pacific,
Science, conscience, scientific.
Liberty, library, heave and heaven,
Rachel, ache, moustache, eleven.
We say hallowed, but allowed,
People, leopard, towed, but vowed.
Mark the differences, moreover,
Between mover, cover, clover;
Leeches, breeches, wise, precise,
Chalice, but police and lice;
Camel, constable, unstable,
Principle, disciple, label.
Petal, panel, and canal,
Wait, surprise, plait, promise, pal.
Worm and storm, chaise, chaos, chair,
Senator, spectator, mayor.
Tour, but our and succour, four.
Gas, alas, and Arkansas.
Sea, idea, Korea, area,
Psalm, Maria, but malaria.
Youth, south, southern, cleanse and clean.
Doctrine, turpentine, marine.
Compare alien with Italian,
Dandelion and battalion.
Sally with ally, yea, ye,
Eye, I, ay, aye, whey, and key.
Say aver, but ever, fever,
Neither, leisure, skein, deceiver.
Heron, granary, canary.
Crevice and device and aerie.
Face, but preface, not efface.
Phlegm, phlegmatic, ass, glass, bass.
Large, but target, gin, give, verging,
Ought, out, joust and scour, scourging.
Ear, but earn and wear and tear
Do not rhyme with here but ere.
Seven is right, but so is even,
Hyphen, roughen, nephew Stephen,
Monkey, donkey, Turk and jerk,
Ask, grasp, wasp, and cork and work.
Pronunciation (think of Psyche!)
Is a paling stout and spikey?
Won’t it make you lose your wits,
Writing groats and saying grits?
It’s a dark abyss or tunnel:
Strewn with stones, stowed, solace, gunwale,
Islington and Isle of Wight,
Housewife, verdict and indict.
Finally, which rhymes with enough,
Though, through, plough, or dough, or cough?
Hiccough has the sound of cup.
My advice is to give up!!!
English Pronunciation by G. Nolst Trenité
After trying the verses, a Frenchman said he’d prefer six months of hard labour to reading six lines aloud.
Dearest creature in creation,
Study English pronunciation.
I will teach you in my verse
Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse.
I will keep you, Suzy, busy,
Make your head with heat grow dizzy.
Tear in eye, your dress will tear.
So shall I! Oh hear my prayer.
Just compare heart, beard, and heard,
Dies and diet, lord and word,
Sword and sward, retain and Britain.
(Mind the latter, how it’s written.)
Now I surely will not plague you
With such words as plaque and ague.
But be careful how you speak:
Say break and steak, but bleak and streak;
Cloven, oven, how and low,
Script, receipt, show, poem, and toe.
Hear me say, devoid of trickery,
Daughter, laughter, and Terpsichore,
Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles,
Exiles, similes, and reviles;
Scholar, vicar, and cigar,
Solar, mica, war and far;
One, anemone, Balmoral,
Kitchen, lichen, laundry, laurel;
Gertrude, German, wind and mind,
Scene, Melpomene, mankind.
Billet does not rhyme with ballet,
Bouquet, wallet, mallet, chalet.
Blood and flood are not like food,
Nor is mould like should and would.
Viscous, viscount, load and broad,
Toward, to forward, to reward.
And your pronunciation’s OK
When you correctly say croquet,
Rounded, wounded, grieve and sieve,
Friend and fiend, alive and live.
Ivy, privy, famous; clamour
And enamour rhyme with hammer.
River, rival, tomb, bomb, comb,
Doll and roll and some and home.
Stranger does not rhyme with anger,
Neither does devour with clangour.
Souls but foul, haunt but aunt,
Font, front, wont, want, grand, and grant,
Shoes, goes, does. Now first say finger,
And then singer, ginger, linger,
Real, zeal, mauve, gauze, gouge and gauge,
Marriage, foliage, mirage, and age.
Query does not rhyme with very,
Nor does fury sound like bury.
Dost, lost, post and doth, cloth, loth.
Job, nob, bosom, transom, oath.
Though the differences seem little,
We say actual but victual.
Refer does not rhyme with deafer.
Fe0ffer does, and zephyr, heifer.
Mint, pint, senate and sedate;
Dull, bull, and George ate late.
Scenic, Arabic, Pacific,
Science, conscience, scientific.
Liberty, library, heave and heaven,
Rachel, ache, moustache, eleven.
We say hallowed, but allowed,
People, leopard, towed, but vowed.
Mark the differences, moreover,
Between mover, cover, clover;
Leeches, breeches, wise, precise,
Chalice, but police and lice;
Camel, constable, unstable,
Principle, disciple, label.
Petal, panel, and canal,
Wait, surprise, plait, promise, pal.
Worm and storm, chaise, chaos, chair,
Senator, spectator, mayor.
Tour, but our and succour, four.
Gas, alas, and Arkansas.
Sea, idea, Korea, area,
Psalm, Maria, but malaria.
Youth, south, southern, cleanse and clean.
Doctrine, turpentine, marine.
Compare alien with Italian,
Dandelion and battalion.
Sally with ally, yea, ye,
Eye, I, ay, aye, whey, and key.
Say aver, but ever, fever,
Neither, leisure, skein, deceiver.
Heron, granary, canary.
Crevice and device and aerie.
Face, but preface, not efface.
Phlegm, phlegmatic, ass, glass, bass.
Large, but target, gin, give, verging,
Ought, out, joust and scour, scourging.
Ear, but earn and wear and tear
Do not rhyme with here but ere.
Seven is right, but so is even,
Hyphen, roughen, nephew Stephen,
Monkey, donkey, Turk and jerk,
Ask, grasp, wasp, and cork and work.
Pronunciation (think of Psyche!)
Is a paling stout and spikey?
Won’t it make you lose your wits,
Writing groats and saying grits?
It’s a dark abyss or tunnel:
Strewn with stones, stowed, solace, gunwale,
Islington and Isle of Wight,
Housewife, verdict and indict.
Finally, which rhymes with enough,
Though, through, plough, or dough, or cough?
Hiccough has the sound of cup.
My advice is to give up!!!
English Pronunciation by G. Nolst Trenité
Friday, May 3, 2013
The Perils of English.....in foreign countries
The perils of English - A collection of howlers...
In a Bangkok temple:
"IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN, EVEN A FOREIGNER,
IF DRESSED
AS A MAN."
Cocktail lounge, Norway:
"LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE
BAR."
Doctors' office, Rome:
"SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES"
Dry cleaners, Bangkok:
"DROP YOUR TROUSERS HERE FOR THE BEST RESULTS"
In a Nairobi restaurant:
"CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE
THE MANAGER"
On a River/highway crossing:
"TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD
IS
IMPASSABLE."
On a poster at an educational institution:
"ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO, WE CAN HELP
YOU"
In a City restaurant:
"OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS"
A sign seen on an automatic restroom hand dryer:
"DO NOT ACTIVATE WITH WET HANDS"
In a cemetery:
"PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY
BUT THEIR
OWN GRAVES"
Tokyo hotel's rules and regulations:
"GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE OR DO OTHER
DISGUSTING
BEHAVIORS IN BED"
On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:
"OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR."
In a Tokyo bar:
"SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS"
Hotel, Yugoslavia:
"THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE IS THE JOB
OF THE
CHAMBERMAID"
Hotel, Japan:
"YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE
CHAMBERMAID."
In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across a monastery:
"YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS
RUSSIAN AND
SOVIET COMPOSERS, ARTISTS, AND WRITERS ARE BURIED
DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY"
A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest:
"IT IS STR ICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING
SITE THAT
PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT SEX, FOR INSTANCE, MEN AND WOMEN,
LIVE
TOGETHER IN ONE TENT UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH
OTHER FOR
THIS PURPOSE"
Hotel, Zurich:
"BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF
THE
OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE
LOBBY BE
USED FOR THIS PURPOSE"
Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand:
"WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?"
The box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong:
"GUARANTEED TO WORK
THROUGHOUT ITS USEFUL LIFE"
In a Swiss mountain inn:
"SPECIAL TODAY - NO ICE-CREAM"
Airline ticket office, Copenhagen:
"WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS."
A laundry in Rome:
"LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE
AFTERNOON HAVING A
GOOD TIME."
In a Bangkok temple:
"IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN, EVEN A FOREIGNER,
IF DRESSED
AS A MAN."
Cocktail lounge, Norway:
"LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE
BAR."
Doctors' office, Rome:
"SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES"
Dry cleaners, Bangkok:
"DROP YOUR TROUSERS HERE FOR THE BEST RESULTS"
In a Nairobi restaurant:
"CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE
THE MANAGER"
On a River/highway crossing:
"TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD
IS
IMPASSABLE."
On a poster at an educational institution:
"ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO, WE CAN HELP
YOU"
In a City restaurant:
"OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS"
A sign seen on an automatic restroom hand dryer:
"DO NOT ACTIVATE WITH WET HANDS"
In a cemetery:
"PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY
BUT THEIR
OWN GRAVES"
Tokyo hotel's rules and regulations:
"GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE OR DO OTHER
DISGUSTING
BEHAVIORS IN BED"
On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:
"OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR."
In a Tokyo bar:
"SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS"
Hotel, Yugoslavia:
"THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE IS THE JOB
OF THE
CHAMBERMAID"
Hotel, Japan:
"YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE
CHAMBERMAID."
In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across a monastery:
"YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS
RUSSIAN AND
SOVIET COMPOSERS, ARTISTS, AND WRITERS ARE BURIED
DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY"
A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest:
"IT IS STR ICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING
SITE THAT
PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT SEX, FOR INSTANCE, MEN AND WOMEN,
LIVE
TOGETHER IN ONE TENT UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH
OTHER FOR
THIS PURPOSE"
Hotel, Zurich:
"BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF
THE
OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE
LOBBY BE
USED FOR THIS PURPOSE"
Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand:
"WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?"
The box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong:
"GUARANTEED TO WORK
THROUGHOUT ITS USEFUL LIFE"
In a Swiss mountain inn:
"SPECIAL TODAY - NO ICE-CREAM"
Airline ticket office, Copenhagen:
"WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS."
A laundry in Rome:
"LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE
AFTERNOON HAVING A
GOOD TIME."
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)